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In 2023, we’re going to let go of the “shoulds” and start saying YES to the goals, habits, and routines that work for YOU, YOUR body, and YOUR lifestyle. Because you deserve to live a life that lights you up. Let’s talk about tips & goals to help you get there.
In this episode, I share…
listen to the full episode on:
In 2023 we’re going to release perfectionism and our fear of failure. Why? Because we trust ourselves and know what we need to do in order to take care of our bodies! We know that we are worthy of rest, trying again, and even asking for help. You are now the woman who gives herself permission to experiment, pivot, fail, and try again.
If you’ve never read the book Mindset by Carol Dweck, now is the time to do so. It’s $8 on Amazon! This book literally changed my life. It was the thing that broke my perfectionism streak in the best way. I no longer identify as a perfectionist because of this book!!!
Here’s the tea: We can either have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset. A fixed mindset says, “This is just who I am. I’ve never been good at sticking to new goals. Something always gets in my way. At this point, I’m not going to change. I am who I am.” A fixed mindset believes you either got it or you don’t – that you’re born with a certain skill set and that there are certain things you’re just not going to be able to achieve.
On the other hand, a growth mindset believes everything can be figured out. If there’s something you don’t know, you can learn it. If you fail, you can try again. You can always grow and be made new. You can transform any habit. Learning that a growth mindset even exists changed everything for me and I wanted to pass this along to you in case it’s the thing that really helps you break free from perfectionism once and for all.
Ask yourself questions like… Am I happy? What am I resisting? What feels heavy? What can I set down? What would make today more fun? Where am I letting other people’s expectations define my success? What do I actually want?
Keep coming back to these questions each and every time you feel like something might be off. You can always tweak your goals and habits along the way.
I don’t know about you but I don’t just want to set goals and hit them… I also want to have a lot of fun as I live them out. I want to infuse joy into everything I do. I want to be present and allow myself to feel and cry and dance and express how I’m feeling without being afraid of what others might think. I don’t want to feel guilty for resting, setting boundaries, or saying no. I want to feel empowered to trust myself and listen to my body.
I express my needs, I share my heart, I allow myself to rest, and I dream big dreams and take daily action towards them. That’s my 2023 vibe!!
Rest is productive. Joy is necessary. And play makes everything feel a bit more childlike, curious, and magic.
It’s easy to set goals that are actually more about other people’s actions than our own. For example, even though it would be a cool to get 10,000 downloads on the podcast this year, I can’t control how many people will listen to this podcast.
Now, what I can control is how often I post, how much time I set aside each week to brainstorm topic ideas, record, edit, and upload. That I can do! So instead of the goal being to get 10,000 downloads, a better goal would be, never miss a Monday upload or schedule 2 hours every Sunday to plan & record an episode. And then I can reverse engineer the steps it will take to get there.
Another example of a popular new year’s goal is to lose 20 pounds. That’s one of those goals you can’t really control. But you can control the habits that could lead to that goal. For example, you could create a goal of buying 3 extra veggies while you’re at the grocery store this week or drinking water first thing in the morning or going for a daily walk with your Bala Bangles (my personal fav). Those are the things you can control!
It’s so much easier to bring a goal to life when you work backwards. I like to break my goals into tiny little steps because it helps make things feel attainable. For example, if your goal is to walk every single day, what would it take to go for a walk? What steps would you have to take before you get out on a walk? Well, you’d get dressed, put on sneakers, tie up your hair, pick a podcast or playlist to listen to, and strap on your wrist weights!
Once you know all the steps, you can start to set yourself up for success. You can create a little pile with a workout outfit, sock, shoes, hair tie, and wrist weights. You can even pre-fill a water bottle so it’s ready to go, create a playlist on Spotify that empowers you, or download your favorite podcast in advance so it doesn’t buffer on your walk. You could even schedule time in your Google Calendar because you actually have to create space for the things you want to do!! So we picked a goal, then listed out all the steps required to take action on that goal.
I reverse engineer everything – from recording podcast episodes to getting better at pushups, eating more veggies during the day, and launching new products in my business.
Instead of making a goal for the year, make a shorter, “sprint” goal that will help you get a quick win. That win will help you build momentum. It will help you feel confident and proud of yourself.
So here’s what we’re going to do: Set a goal you could accomplish in a shorter time span of your choosing. Give yourself the opportunity to really come through for YOU.
Also, for the record, you don’t have to plan your entire year today. I personally like to plan my goals in 3 month increments and even 1 month increments. It feels attainable, more realistic, and do-able. I have a list of goals I’d like to hit for the year and then I comb back through that list and pick a handful of things I want to focus on for the next 3 months. Then I break it down even further with 1 thing I will focus on for the week. That helps me get a win right off the bat and build momentum as I move throughout the rest of the year.
You are worthy of celebration. You’re out here showing up, even on the days you feel tired and want to quit. That is freakin incredible. The fact that you’re here and still willing to dream is something you can feel so proud of. You’re doing a really good job.
Just because a habit works really well for [insert social media influencer here] doesn’t mean you should feel bad if that goal doesn’t resonate with you. You’re allowed to want different things. You’re allowed to want something that works for you, your body, and your lifestyle. You’re allowed to create goals on your terms. I think this really goes back to the idea of trusting yourself. You know what dreams are on your heart. You know what lights you up. So lean into that, even if it doesn’t quite fit the mold.
People don’t realize how much strength it takes to pull yourself out of a dark place and go to work, take a shower, or sign up for a workout class. So friend, if that’s you today, I’m so proud of you. Please be so proud of yourself this year. I hope you’re so enamored by your growth this year. I hope you celebrate yourself every time you allow yourself to take a nap. I hope you cheer yourself on every time you drink a sip of water, take a supplement, or add an extra veggie to your breakfast, lunch, or dinner. The small things are everything and everything you do is worthy of celebration. YOU are worthy of celebration.
Wishing you your best year yet, friend. Happy 2023!!. If I can support you in loving your body, setting new goals, and creating habits that last a lifetime, please reach out. I’d love to answer any questions you have or share more about how we could work 1-on-1 together this year. And with that, I’m signing off and sending you so much love. You are enough 💛